|Hold Your Head High Heavy Heart.
||[May. 25th, 2007|12:02 am]
Dunder-Mifflin Scranton (An Office RP)
Karen sat on her couch staring off into space. Everything had happened so fast -- she didn't expect it to. She didn't expect to have her epileptic episode in front of Jim. She didn't expect to be this upset. She doesn't know why she accused him of sleeping with her -- she hated how she acted eariler that night. She tells herself that she should be mad that Jim up and left her like that -- but she wasn't. She loved Jim. She really did. But, she didn't know if things were done now. She didn't know if they would still be friends.
The doctor said if Jim didn't take her to the hospital -- she would've died. Jim basically saved her life. She hadn't taken her medicine in six months -- they had to run a CAT scan to look at her brain activity. Realization suddenly hit her --- she could've died. What if she died in Jim's arms, how would he feel? She hated thinking about the consequences. It was her own fault, though. She was basically killing herself.
She was dreading going into work in the morning, but she had to. She didn't want to hate anyone, as much as she was hurt -- she couldn't do it. Pam was a really sweet girl, she couldn't do it. She would walk in, look Pam straight in the eyes --- and smile. She wishes she was brave like Pam -- she wishes she had confidence.
Maybe it's time for me to be honest with people.
She picked up her cell phone hesitantly and dialed Jim's number. Luckily, it went to voice mail.
She sighed heavily and left a message ...
Hey -- it's me -- Karen, um -- I just wanted to tell you I'm home from the hospital. I'm sorry - about everything. Jim -- I haven't been fully honest with you -- and I shouldn't have kept this from you. I know -- I know telling this over the phone is a bad idea but -- I have to. I have to tell you what's been going on with me and what I've been basically doing to myself which basically puts me at fault here. I'm sick -- I'm really sick -- and -- you know .. I think it's better if we talked in person. If that's okay? Just -- normal -- talk. I need to tell you everything. I'll -- call me back or -- I'll talk to you soon. Just we really need to talk -- please. I- I love you, Jim. Goodbye.
She shut her phone and a tear went down her cheek; she hates herself for not telling him. But -- will he hate her too?